The most likely conclusion to my current predicament is psychosis.
Much more likely than actual alien abduction.
Significantly more likely than impending forced nuptials with a giant primitive alien whose society never evolved a sense of humor.
But life in a horny space-barbarian's cave isn't all bad...
Did I mention he vibrates?
**This is a full length insta-love Alien romance. It's funny, filthy, over-the top, and completely delicious.